Thursday, 4 August 2016

An Exercise in Focus

This sad corner of cyberspace was languishing untended to for a very long time, a year almost... Although there will be a 'now I'm 36, jeeez, what do I do?' post coming later in the month, this one is just an exercise in focus and clarity. I've become so distracted and so out of focus in my daily activities, both job and home related, that I do not recognize myself anymore. My brain is scattered, my thoughts jump from subject to subject, even when I engage in simple home activities like clearing clutter from the living room. I get tangled in several other tasks simultaneously - and also completely unawaress - and it takes me sometimes as many as 30 minutes to get back to what I originally started doing. I seem unable to go about my business just finishing one task at a time and moving onto the next one. I need to constantly remind myself of this and it is so exhausting and makes completing anything a monumental pain in the butt.
Currently, I am at such a place in the job I do everyday that I need to be so focused and so intense and produce a ton of stuff and I'm just not capable of it. I am not. And it seems there is nothing I can do about it. So. That is why I'm trying to start posting here everyday, introducing some discipline into my daily doings, assigning a subject and writing for 15-20 minutes just to get my brain in a place of calm and logical, analythical thinking that flows freely into ordered words, sentences, thoughts, paragraphs. The plan is I get into work, write here for half an hour and then move onto my daily tasks. Writing other stuff, first and foremost.
We'll see how that goes. That's it for today.

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