My stress coping mechanisms go on and off from day to day, I feel as if I am about to have a complete melt down more than once every day but somehow I keep it together. Trying to enjoy life in the process seems more of a chore than the way it should be because at times I am also overburdened with this never ending quest for happiness and the 'you have to be happy' imperative that we seem to impose on ourselves. It's ok not to be happy all the time, methinks. That takes so much energy and effort.
What I long for the most is the balance. The balance in thoughts, feelings, actions. That is the state I'm after and for the life of me I cannot vouch that it will be attainable ever in my case. But I'm working on it.
For all those who enjoy heightened emotions and drama in life, love and espionage, have a go at 'Moskva kva-kva' ('Moscow ow ow', as translated in English) by Vasily Aksyonov. A somewhat ridiculous spy thriller describing how Tito and Stalin plotted against each other back in the 50s is sprinkled with a proper amount of romance and makes for a good weekend read.
I leave you with a few images of Belgrade in autumn that I love and that make me feel like I'm in Paris . . . Minus the flashy, improperly parked cars, that just scream 'Belgrade baby' ;-)
p.s. edited to add: